It has been 15 days since our wedding, and my husband is already boarding a China-bound red eye just to get away from me. Yup, I’m that insufferable…All kidding aside, if I hadn’t know about this Asian business trip several months in advance I think I probably would be drowning in paranoia right now and counting all the ways I’m apparently rapid-fire failing as a wife. It’s always easy to worry that we’re doing something wrong in our relationships after all, and the fact that married people tend to act like marriage is a secret club filled with transcendental experiences doesn’t exactly help me stave off these worries as a newlywed. I mean, am I alone in this or have you also heard innumerable accounts of “Marriage is the best!” or “You think it won’t change things, but everything feels different when you’re married!” – sound familiar? Well, as an unabashed newlywed I’ll just come out and admit to you that my life doesn’t feel all that different now than it did 15 days ago.
Sure, marriage has brought about a few changes, such as the blissful stress relief of no longer having to plan a wedding and the sneakily victorious feeling I get whenever I spot my husband’s wedding band on his finger, but – other than the elation that comes from pulling off the con of the century and convincing the most amazing man I know to commit to a lifetime with my crazy ass – our life is the same as it has been for a while. The hectic travels around the globe, the full-body sighs of crawling into bed after late nights of work, and the tireless communications have been and will be the foundation of our relationship for a long time to come. This is not to downplay the profundity of our wedding vows or the meaning behind the ring I conned onto my husband’s finger, but these things just feel like a natural (and almost inevitable) part of our relationship spectrum – part of the love story I’ve seemingly always known my sweet and I would spend the rest of our lives writing.
Ask me when I’m 70 and maybe then I’ll be able to tell you what makes marriage truly different, transcendental, and worth all the hard work and hype. Until then, I’d be tickled pink to hear your thoughts on love and commitment. Are you single, dating or married? Do you feel that you need to get married in order to be truly committed to someone? Have you always thought there would be something different about being married and that it would make your relationship exist on a whole new plane? I would love to hear from you! Leave a comment.