Sweet Nothings


Although we no longer team up to dig my mom’s car out of the snow every winter and pelt each other with snowballs, my sisters are an ever-present part of me

I’m taking a quick trip back to Massachusetts to attend my cousin’s wedding this summer, and I’m already giddy with excitement about the time I’ll get to spend with my sisters… Sisterhood is such a precious and funny thing. You go through childhood both hating and loving each other fiercely, and if you’re lucky you escape into your adult years as friends. You get your sense of loyalty and morality from each other, and you first learn from one another the oh-so-painful lesson of what it means to hurt the feelings of someone you truly love. For this reason, there is absolutely no point in pretending around sisters – they know exactly who you are in your ugliest moments, and you have no choice but to be hopelessly honest and flawed around each other. Maybe that’s why I feel so serene in the few days I get to spend with my sisters each year – they know I’m ridiculous and far from perfect, yet they love me anyway. There’s such a strange peace in that, and there’s nothing I enjoy more than sitting on a porch playing cards with these two gals while making fun of anything and everything on the planet…

Oh, how infatuated I was with my middle sister when she was a wee baby (little did I know what a firecracker she would grow up to be, and that she would actually teach me many things)

My youngest sister was and still is such a little, blonde bundle of energy (who ironically now towers over our family – in the photo below my middle sister and I are wearing heels to make up for this height injustice)

My sisters made my wedding day feel so incredibly special, and I only hope I can return the favor somehow by the time we’re old ladies playing cards on a porch

Psst: Do you have siblings? Do you feel that they’ve shaped you into the person you are today as much as I feel mine have? Leave a comment.

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  • Reply clarissa June 21, 2012 at 12:52 pm

    I love the sentiment and have often wished that my sisters (of which I have 7) and I were closer but somehow I grew up and apart while others grew closer. It is such a precious gift to have those bonds forever. My sisters did impact who I am today, no doubt, but often I used them as a cautionary tale, an anti-role-model. I learned not to make many of their mistakes: don’t do drugs, don’t drop out, don’t become a house wife, don’t smoke, don’t over drink, don’t have too many babies, don’t marry the wrong person, don’t become a junkie, don’t be a religious fanatic, don’t hold grudges against your parents (learned that one the hard way), don’t forget what your natural hair color is, don’t move back home, don’t forget to pay back what you owe, don’t, don’t, don’t, don’t. They are good too but somehow also on the opposite end of the world from where I often find myself in terms of perspective and decision making. Since, I’m revealing all this I should also say many of them have come a long way but I still don’t find myself calling them to build the bonds. My mother has often commented on what might happen when she is gone, will her daughters communicate and be close with each other until the end of our days as she has with her sisters? I don’t know. maybe.

    • Reply Coté June 21, 2012 at 9:41 pm

      You bring up such an interesting concept, Clarissa – you’re so right that it’s possible to really, truly, deeply love someone for the tough lessons they’ve taught us (or for the how-tos they’ve given us in reverse)…I also agree that it’s really hard to maintain relationships when your lives and social worlds veer off into completely different paths. Sometimes when that happens with people I know and I run into them years later I find myself with absolutely nothing to talk about (and then kinda wonder how the heck we ever had anything to talk about in the first place)…But then there are those other people who I’ll not communicate with for years and then suddenly we meet up and we have gads to talk about. My sisters and I often qualify for this last category, because we really don’t talk that much in any given year – I guess, like with everything else, sibling interactions are all about quality instead of quantity…Now, don’t forget to stay away from religious fanatics and remember your natural hair color. 😉

  • Reply Jennifer June 25, 2012 at 8:33 am

    I completely agree that family can shape the person you become and the manner in which you express your emotions to others. Being the youngest of three sisters was a harrowing ordeal growing up, but continuing to be the black sheep as an adult gives my sisters the opportunity to call me and get a fresh perspective on life and their choices. My middle sister asked to send me back as a baby because she wanted a brother, but now I don’t think we’d trade each other for anything in the world 🙂

    • Reply Coté July 6, 2012 at 4:02 pm

      Oh my goodness, I can’t believe I wasn’t notifies of your comment until now, Jennifer. (Sorry for the technical glitch/rudeness on my part!) Anyhoo, I really love what you say about the unique perspectives you can give your siblings as a result of how different you are. It really is so cool how sisterhood (and I assume brotherhood) gives you a chance to be friends with someone you wouldn’t necessarily be friends with otherwise due to age, etc…I’m sure my youngest sister could commiserate with you on your little-sibling woes, BTW. My middle sister and I may not have tried to trade her in for a brother, but we did convince our little sis that she’d been left on our doorstep by aliens. How any of us survive childhood pranks like this is quite the mystery. 😉

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