I don’t know about you, but I feel like I’m still waiting for someone to throw a parade to celebrate making it to the other side of everything we’ve been through as a species since 2020. This, of course, always starts the worry-chorus in my brain churning with, “Wait, but are we really on the other side of anything? Isn’t there a new germ, a new war, and a new slew of horrific tragedies waiting just around the corner? Don’t you dare celebrate yet!” I tend to apply this kind of thinking to celebrating or just plain sharing my own personal and professional news, too — in my mind, bolder accomplishments and bigger news are always a mere matter of weeks/months away, so why crack open that bubbly in the piddly ol’ here and now?
BUT, with the start of a new year I figure I’ll attempt to break with my usual habits and share a bit about what I’ve been up to lately…
You know that scene toward the end of When Harry Met Sally where Harry tracks Sally down at a New Year’s Eve ball to profess his love to her? If not, here’s a little primer on this iconic rom-com moment… He essentially rattles off a bunch of quirky, adorably specific traits he finds endearing about her and then says:
“It’s not because I’m lonely, and it’s not because it’s New Year’s Eve. I came here tonight because when you realize you want to spend the rest of your life with somebody, you want the rest of your life to start as soon as possible.”
Pretty romantic, right? Well, not too long ago I had a moment of romance a lot like it… With my career.
It’s that time of year again. Time to pose in goofy photo booths at holiday parties, drink too much eggnog, cry about all the weight that will inevitably be gained from said eggnog, and then eat an entire gingerbread house to cheer one’s self up. Yup, that’s pretty much where I’m at right now. Except, when I’m not stifling my cries with gingerbread, I’m actually feeling damn grateful for this past year, and — to top that off — I don’t think I’ve ever felt so excited to embark on a new one…
The husband and me silly-ing it up at a holiday party this year
Why, hello there. Since last we spoke I’ve become a redhead, discovered an awesome recipe for flourless chocolate-chip cookies, and, oh yeah, been working on a damn cool TV show at NBC. It’s all been nothing short of a whirlwind, but, when I look back on the blurry big events of the last year, what stands out to me most is this: somewhere in between all the milestones, Los Angeles has started to feel more like home. LA is such a big, daunting city with no real center to speak of, but the hubby and I have been taking it on day-by-day — renovating our house every chance we get and finding new pockets of this ocean-side desert that we love. I just wanted to pop by to share these updates and say hello. Write at ya soon! xo, Coté
Jackie Kennedy and her daughter photographed in a time when being a stay-at-home mom was the only choice many women had
Have you read the recent Atlantic Monthly article titled Why Women Still Can’t Have It All? It is basically one high-powered woman’s account of why she left government so she could be a better mom to her teenage sons, and it’s also full of policy-making suggestions on how bosses and corporations can make it easier for women to balance their careers with parenting. In a sense, the article attempts to be a ground-breaking piece that flies in the face of feminist optimism, but I think the article itself is actually a whole lot more blindly optimistic than it seems upon first read. While I appreciate the suggestions Anne-Marie Slaughter (former director of policy planning at the State Department) makes and I think her ideas could improve work/life balance in this country for both men and women a great deal, I disagree with the way Slaughter implies that once these changes are in place women just might be able to finally “have it all.” I think these implications are extremely faulty because – drum roll, please – even with all the money and flexible work hours in the world, it just ain’t possible for anyone (whether male or female) to have and/or do it all…
The Kennedys and their once-picaresque model of American family life
First off, let me just say two words: silly me. S-to-the-I-to-the-double-L-Y me…Back in April 2011, when I wrote this post, I was under the impression that my anxieties about child rearing would somehow subside once I was married. After all, I would be fully committed to the love of my life – a man who happens to be my best friend in the whole world and loves me unconditionally for me (not for the power of my uterus) – and I thought this would provide unshakable comfort in the face of procreation pressures. Not only did I make this faulty assumption, but I also thought our move to Los Angeles would bolster me with the drive to put my career on the front burner and leave talk of children in the dust. However, even in this fitness-obsessed city where mom jeans and birthing stretch marks are considered shameful, I find myself surrounded by more messages than ever that I should be able to do it all – messages that tell me I am defective if I can’t figure out how to be both a successful artist, mom, and sex-pot wife. With these societal naggings conspiring alongside biological urges and ticking clocks, is it any wonder that family planning remains on the forefront of my mind? And, if an otherwise confident, career-oriented person like me is plagued with this anxiety, how on Garp’s green earth is everyone else out there coping with their own cognitive dissonance on the issue of work/life/family balance?
In reality this girl is running a marathon, but see how motionless the coffe cup makes her look?
Indifferent exercise tip of the week: Carry a paper cup of coffee on your power walk, and you will look infinitely less active. In fact, studies show that people in tight jeans holding a big paper cup give off the appearance of standing completely still.** Not still enough to actually be made of marble, though, so you won’t look like you’re trying to win a contest for who can freeze the most like an Italian statue. After all, the life of a hipster is not as full of lame, faux artistry as the challenges of America’s Next Top Model. On the contrary, the life and exercise of a hipster is poetry in motion. When done properly all the motion is secret, of course, and this makes you a caffeinated, calorie-burning, ninja poet.
**Who does these studies? I don’t know, and I don’t care. Studies are lame. Do you think studies and exercising are lame? Leave a comment.
Converse experiencing a minor emergency in the name of indifferent exercise
Judging from the title of this post, you may think I’ve scurried off on a tangent and have no intention whatsoever of imparting valuable insight about indifferent exercise today. But, au contraire, the lesser-mentioned bodily functions of the hipster universe are actually a major part of indifferent exercise. You see, when you elect to work out in a more subtle manner than going to a painfully obvious gym, chances are you’re working up a sweat outside and are exposed to all sorts of calls of nature (yours and otherwise). Here are some quick fixes to help keep you burning calories straight on through fields of cow manure, while keeping everyone none the wiser…
Broken neon-green shades are just a casualty of indifferent exercise
Do you ever see a hipster’s legs looking so damn svelte in skinny jeans and wonder, “How does he do it?” I know I do; fitting into tight pants takes a lot of work, and concealing all this hard work from the world requires even more effort. Lucky for you, me, and that pudgy poser over there wearing a fanny pack and Christmas knee socks, the veil is finally being lifted from the skinny-jeans secret. With The Hipster’s Guide to Indifferent Exercise, you, too, can get a complete workout without letting on to the world that you’re actually trying. Just to give you a taste of what to expect from this pragmatic column in the weeks to come, let’s start by tackling the three biggest wardrobe issues facing indifferent exercisers today…